Who would have thought that the newest plan to the the United States out of the recession is through a website called Cash4gold.com, which gives you cash for your unused gold! I knew we could do it!
Or perhaps this isn’t the best plan of action for America, since they surely won’t get the true value of the gold they would be pawning. Thankfully, this isn’t a real news story, but rather a premise brought to us by the folks at the Onion. Now, if the president actually DOES start to think this is a good, let me be the first one to say that I disagree with this approach to settle our debt. It is not a good idea.
Not going to get to crazy about telling you to vote (not going to use reverse psychology like all of those celebrities, either), but you should vote just as a good habit. If you are too lazy to vote, then you should really rethink your priorities.
Anyway, this is a good video from my buddies Jake and Amir where they go through the voter registration process. Lots of great one-liners here.
Favorite line #1:
“Honestly, I’m leaning toward voting for both. Michael Both, the Libertarian candidate.”
Another favorite:
“I’m conflicted, because one guys says one guy is bad, and the other guy says the other guy is bad. So I think I’m just going to vote for the last person to talk.”
Sarah Silverman… a lot has been said about the cute girl with a foul mouth, so I’m not going to try to outwit anyone here. I just love a woman who can make her vagina the topic of just about any conversation she has. When she goes to a party, her vagina is definitely the 800 pound gorilla in the room. That’s a talent that not many people can pull off.
In this video, she gets a little political and makes the case for getting Jewish people to vote for Obama. I usually shy away from the political humor, but she won over my heart by using the term “Douche Nozzle” within the first 5 seconds. Anyone who knows me knows that this is one of my favorite terms. In fact, I defined it on Urban Dictionary, and my definition is the #1 result!
Douche Nozzle Definition by Yours Truly
Whether you’re voting for Obama or McCain (or a write-in for Nader), you should be able to find some humor in this video. Kudos to my favorite foul mouthed Jewish pseudo girlfriend for making me laugh once again. Now go bang Matt Damon you whore.
